Most couples couldn’t imagine having a family of twelve kids. But the Howards’ do… 4 of their own, and 8 adopted. They agreed to share their story with us — not because they’re super-parents… They say they’re not. But they claim if *they* can do it… *anyone can.
Almost no one around this table is an exceptional artist. That’s not the point. The Howards gather as a family for the “togetherness” factor. In the last twelve years, they’ve grown to twelve kids… Starting with four biological children, then foster parenting…Then adopting…
“Well I mean, if you would’ve told me at 18 that I would have 12 kids by the time I was 41, I would’ve committed suicide… but you know GOD gives you what you can handle, little tiny bits and sometimes he does give you a heads up what’s coming in,” says adoptive father Jeremy.
“I think many times that’s the case the wife is dragging their husband, but we flip-flopped, and he quickly became the advocate for the children, and he was the one who kept saying we can take one more, let’s we got a have their brothers and sisters together, but I was crying and thinking I don’t think I can handle one more detoxing child,” says adoptive father, Beth.
Yes, there were challenges… drug babies… dealing with diversity, just feeding a big family… And finding room for everyone.
“Well we have a 15 passenger van we used to have a 12 now we have a 15,” admits Jeremy.
But in the end, they learned to be realistic about the challenges.
“So I don’t expect anything from the children. I don’t expect them to love me or to be grateful because adoption is not… it doesn’t start beautiful, it starts broken, it starts with total grief and loss and the destruction of their first family,” says Beth.
“That’s something adopted son — Samson — readily admits when talking about his natural mother:
“I think she definitely did want me, she just couldn’t take care of me. So she definitely did want me..she tried… maybe not her best but she tried to get me back,” says Samson.
Autumn was adopted by the Howards at 7.
“I think it was transforming for all of us, I think that… it was hard to make connections with each other at first, but then when you get to know each other and things, because there’s a lot of fighting at first, but… a lot of fighting (laughs), admits Autumn.
“You are changing… you’re literally changing an individual’s world because of your choice, and all you get a do is just love this person who needs love,” adds Jeremy.
“You could call it love, but it’s really commitment, it’s the commitment to say I’m with you, I’m on your team, we’re here and we’re in this together, and it’s I’m not going anywhere. And that is more important,” claims Beth.
So many Clark County foster children are still waiting to find a family like the Howards. Call the Adoption Exchange now to find out more 702-436-6335.